bitesized takes her first bite.

Since this is a blog about my and 1shot2many's dating mishaps, we thought it'd be appropriate to list our three dating handicaps and why we're doing this. While we'll be the first to regale you of our dating woes and how this guy sucked and that guy was just a mess, we would be remiss if we didn't recognize our own flaws - especially in light of the fact that, at the end of the day, we chose these people. Sometimes drunk, yes, but my point remains.

And so...

My three dating handicaps? Aside from my dating history in general?? Well, let's see...

1) I have yet to be able to strike a balance between wearing my heart on my sleeve and tucking it away somewhere behind my kidneys. I tend to operate in extremes, and within the last couple of years the pendulum has shifted to complete and utter concealment of my feelings (with the exception of a recent attempt to expose myself to the elements by telling someone how I feel). It is obviously a defensive mechanism that I use to shield myself from vulnerability and rejection. Heart of steel, right? You will never know whether I like you (at least initially) because I am the master concealer. Feigned ambivalence has been a faithful friend, but I'm tired.
2) I'm told my standards are too high. I do not maintain these standards without demanding as much of myself, but I am still told they are too high. I have a spotty dating history which led to my finding these standards and holding onto them for dear life for fear of encountering Jackass #57. I'll admit I'm picky, but I think I've been fair. I've tried to give everyone a fair shake, but I won't budge on what I believe to be are fundamentals. Everyone has things that are fundamentally important to them. Things they cannot concede under any circumstances (though, I think the dating experiences of my friends reflect a slackening of standards). Education. Job. Children. Hairy backs. Take your pick. I won't list mine right now, but I'm sure you'll get an idea of what matters most to me as you read our blog. But yes - I'm told my standards are too high.
3) I'm fatalistic. I'm a worst-case-scenario kind of girl. Girl likes boy. Boy likes girl. Girl immediately starts thinking of the myriad ways boy will lose interest and peace out. Works every time. This is tied to the first handicap - in order to protect myself, I shut down and consequently push people away. It sucks.

After hearing my many dating horror stories (many of which are hilarious, so stay tuned), several friends suggested I start a blog to get this all down on (electronic) paper. Still not sure how I feel about turning my life into fodder, but 1shot2many thought it'd be a great idea, and together we have enough stories to keep this blog going for awhile. It's also perfect that we're doing this together because we have been necessary sources of sanity for each other when the neuroses takes over. So, this blog will not only be an opportunity for us to reflect/purge ourselves of the shame associated with the memory of guys we can't quite forget, but also a chance for us to offer perspective on each other's entries. Enjoy.