i'm on a bus back to new york. a fairly unassuming gentleman stopped a young woman on her way to the restroom, and asked her if he'd like to sample his array of colognes and perfumes. she assented. said gentleman then began to spritz this young woman with a variety of cheap ass colognes and perfumes that quickly permeated my space. yes, i was very irritated. she offered her commentary on this selection of eau de janky, and when finished, they began conversing about sundry topics with him leaning towards her intently.
OH. I GET IT. he was hitting on her! $9.99 perfumes are a part of his game. he just went to the front of the bus to retrieve her carry-on luggage.
well played, sir. but if you spray that crap again, i'll break your nuts.
Sunday, June 26, 2011
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
yo soy la shadowboxer.
everyone needs someone like 1shot2many to coach them through shittiness. she is great at identifying unreasonable or counterproductive behavior that is often unfair, and that could lead to unexpected and negative consequences. she is also great at pep talks when you need to have super difficult conversations.
sometimes everything really is mostly the other person's fault, but that doesn't mean we have to respond with bitchiness or craziness. sometimes reasonableness and understanding are really the most appropriate responses (while also making your position clear and sticking to the facts, rather than succumbing to the ease of mischaracterization). there seems to be an inclination among people to just let things die silently when confusion or uncertainty sets in because "the signs are clear," "who needs the drama?" and "he's so not worth it."
but honestly, occasionally the signs are clear and we often get them very wrong due to our own baggage or neuroses. assumptions have never gotten anyone very far, so i think, if you have a gut feeling, you should act on it by seeking clarity - not deciding the terms of the relationship for yourself.
and honesty and communication do not automatically lead to drama. people - adults - can be reasonable human beings and have reasonable conversations about what they can and cannot handle.
and it's not about his being worth it - it's about your being worth the benefit of closure, and seeking it using whatever means you deem necessary.
i don't regret a thing. many thanks to him for being a bright spot after a troublesome year.
i'm hoping this is all being deposited into my karma account.
sometimes everything really is mostly the other person's fault, but that doesn't mean we have to respond with bitchiness or craziness. sometimes reasonableness and understanding are really the most appropriate responses (while also making your position clear and sticking to the facts, rather than succumbing to the ease of mischaracterization). there seems to be an inclination among people to just let things die silently when confusion or uncertainty sets in because "the signs are clear," "who needs the drama?" and "he's so not worth it."
but honestly, occasionally the signs are clear and we often get them very wrong due to our own baggage or neuroses. assumptions have never gotten anyone very far, so i think, if you have a gut feeling, you should act on it by seeking clarity - not deciding the terms of the relationship for yourself.
and honesty and communication do not automatically lead to drama. people - adults - can be reasonable human beings and have reasonable conversations about what they can and cannot handle.
and it's not about his being worth it - it's about your being worth the benefit of closure, and seeking it using whatever means you deem necessary.
i don't regret a thing. many thanks to him for being a bright spot after a troublesome year.
i'm hoping this is all being deposited into my karma account.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)